Danger, Will Robinson, DANGER!

As I made my breakfast this morning, some giggles escaped as I recalled a surreal sight from a few days earlier.

It was pouring rain as Newf and I drove through the city. Suddenly, my eye caught sight of a senseless senior standing in her driveway. She was a tiny thing with tightly curled white hair, and every other attribute one would assume a cute little old lady to have (including the tight-lipped grimace).

The woman stood firmly planted in a puddle, both hands tightly grasping a mighty and massive leaf blower. For whatever reason, the lady was hell-bent on blowing the wet leaves clumped and congregating in her driveway.

At first glance, the whole scene seemed merely silly, not stupid. Why this lady needed to clear leaves from her driveway on a sopping wet, soaker of a morning was questionable, but certainly not crazy. What was a little nutty was the fact that this lady was using an electric leaf blower. Not a word of a lie - this woman stood soaking wet, gripping her blower with gut-so, a long yellow extension chord trailing from the blower to the nearest available electrical outlet.

Did I mention it was raining really hard?

As I described the scene to Newf, interchanging chuckles with concern, he matter-of-factly glanced in my direction and said: "Lindsay, when you get to be that age you just don't give a fuck anymore."

Fast forward to this morning. As I made my breakfast, I couldn't help but be saddened by the idea of a funky, fearless lady who no longer cared about her safety. That's exactly when my bagel got stuck in the toaster.

Naturally, I grabbed a fork to fish it out.

I looked at the fork, and then looked at the burning bagel as said, "Fuck it, I'm going to fork it."

Let's just say that I lived to tell the tale. My breakfast was saved - and that little lady got her driveway cleared. It was a lesson well-learned: sometimes, rules are made to be broken.

Sounds good to me.

Your dangerous diner,

L

PS. Please let me stress that this is a humorous piece, and is in no way meant to suggest that holding electrical equipment while standing in a puddle (or in any way covered in moisture) is a good idea. Please do not try this at home.

PPS. Just in case, I should also stress that inserting metal objects into electrical appliances is also a bad idea. You can try this at home, but don't hold me responsible if you die or get harmed in any way. You may also ruin your hair.

It's Freaking Friday: And This is a (Creative) School Thing

Good afternoon dudes and dudettes!

This is actually a quick post for a school project, but, feel free to follow along.

If you are a massive fan of "Where's Waldo" this may be your cup of tea. Or it might not, we will find out.

That being said, today I have to submit an example of "The Databased Image". There have been some pretty neat examples floating around, check out the work of
Chris Jordan for some really freaky examples.

Let's just say I'm taking a different approach. I don't have any dead dodos lying around so I thought I'd provide a little example of my online database. Think of it as a scavenger hunt without a prize.

THE GOAL: You want to find this picture:

It is located *somewhere* in the bowels of this blog.

THE HINT: Because (I assume) my classmates are not frequent fliers here at Linnie gets Laced I assume you don't know the handles of the blogging world, or my blogging world, for that matter.

The boy in the picture is known as "The Newf". Yes, he's my Newfoundland lovah, and yes, he makes a mean plate of fish and chips.

The dog in my picture is known in these parts as "The Beast", mostly because, well, he is a giant beast.

You can locate the picture using a couple of different methods. Check out the post information bar below, and the sidebar for some locating love.

It's an IQ test, and the timer starts NOW! Good luck!

Looking for a likeness,

L

It's All About Me: Time to Go Back to School

A couple of weeks ago I mentioned that I had some big beans to spill. As an extremely superstitious person I tend to hold back on announcements, waiting until contracts are signed and bills are paid.

Today is that day.

You may remember that I recently asked for your help with a project I was working on.

You, my lovely readers came out in spades to assist me - something I am completely grateful for.

Well, that project was my photography portfolio. And that portfolio was successful. I start school in January.

This is exciting for a number of reasons, one of which being the incredibly cool camera I bought today. But the biggest reason this acceptance has me grinning from ear to ear is the very simple reason that I thought my plan was a long shot.

I've always been a little more mad scientist than moody artist. My university career began in chemistry labs and ended in breaking apart bones in the forensics wing. My life and judgements tend to fall in one of two categories: black or white.

As a logical being I never thought I would have a place in art, but I've proved myself wrong.

The Newf, who has been incredibly encouraging as I spend money we don't have, thinks it is a perfect fit. He is convinced I will be take the world by storm and is sickly supportive of anything that will get me onto a boat.

I've got my work cut out for me. Until yesterday I had never laid my hands on a DSLR, let alone own one. However, I have the next two years in a program to begin my love affair with my new best friend: my Nikon D7000.

Friends, thank you for your ideas and thank you for your support.

Soon to be a student (again),

L