Showing posts with label Illness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Illness. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Here I Am (The Public Health Threat)

Hurumph.

Friends, I am slightly bitter over here in Linnie Land.

It all started last week, on Wednesday: while standing in line at the grocery store I sneezed. I wish I could say it was a cute little girl sneeze - one of the barely there blow outs, but no, it was not.

As I've mentioned before, the Powers that Be have decided my motto is "go big or go home". My sneezes are no exception, to be completely honest, I sneeze like a horse. Big and beautiful. I do, of course, ensure that my nose and mouth are pointed in such a direction as to limit the contact of my sneeze by-product with the rest of the public.

Unfortunately, none of this seemed to matter. In one quick swoop I had been push to the bottom of the public pool, I was infected. All conversations halted and I was cut out and ignored.

I was the new leper on the block, and baby, I rocked it.

Regardless, I went home furious that the public fear of disease has grown so great. I laughed at the hens behind me clucking about their insatiable need for anti-bacterial cleansers, gels and sprays.

I satisfied myself with their ignorance (all those anti-bacterial products do nothing but clean the weakest of germs, leaving the big bad ones to infect you) and my newly purchased chocolate ice cream.

A week later, I am sick. My face is leaking, I am freezing cold and my skin hurts. I have enough mucus to feed a small army (if armies ate mucus).

To you ladies in the grocery store: touche.

You have won the battle, but I will win the war.

What is your view on anti-bacterial? Are you pro Purell?

Fighting the (ferocious) flu,

L

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Breaking News (and the Rules), One Ball of Yarn at a Time

Oh goodness, it would only happen to me.

After spending the last couple of days surrounded in illness I woke up feeling marginally better. Seeing as it is just gorgeous outside, I thought a walk downtown was in order.

Fresh air always does a body good.

The Beast was game so I clipped him to his leash and off we went. After stopping at the yarn store and the library we headed home.

It then became apparent the streets were oddly quiet. On a hunch, I checked the news.

Apparently a giant chemical cloud has escaped and Toronto residents are being "ordered" to stay indoors. I suppose I should have checked the news before I left, I just didn't expect a big ball of fury to be unleashed on the city.

I'm pretty far from the blanket of acid leaking from 10 Chemical Court, so maybe I'll head back to the yarn store later tonight.

I'm just that dangerous. Nobody "orders" me to do anything. Booyah.

With burning eyes,

L