Thursday, September 23, 2010

Let's Talk About Sex: Don't Ask, Don't Tell

Daddy always said I avoid speaking about politics and religion. Well, this may be political, it may be religious but above all else it is sexual.

Recently the "don't ask, don't tell" policy entered into the news, the Canadian news. It's a cold day when (you hit the Canadian news).

Well, here is my two cents about the matter.

First, I think that gays have as much of a right to fight for their country than anyone else. Gay, straight, bisexual, who cares? It does not matter to me, nor should it matter to anyone else.

Second, I do not agree with the policy as it currently stands. Sexual orientation, like an individual's sex, should not play a role in one's employment. One should not fear being found out (unless they are touting cocaine across a border, or something of the same).

Third, I agree with the statement, "don't ask, don't tell" in its raw state, free of the bill currently on the table. This statement needs to apply to all.

Currently, in the Canadian military one is not permitted to have a relationship of any sexual substance while deployed. This applies to any type of sexual relationship, regardless of orientation.

Whether deployed or not, why does one have to advertise their sexual orientation? Is this not gauche? A man who walks up to me, all muscles and attitude, coyly mumbling, "Hey baby, I'd like a ride on your gravy train!" gets as much attention as some woman telling me what "wonderful tits" I have.

Unless I am actively searching for a sexual partner, and a quick one at that, any type of advances from any individual are unneeded. If you know me well your advances are even less likely to be desired (as I am currently married to the Newf and he doesn't take well to competition).

So, while in the military I do not see the reason why any one individual would ever have to discuss their sexual orientation. I cannot think of an instance where saying "Oh, by the way, I'm gay/hetero/bi." is going to improve the combative situation, or further, a tense work environment. Your orientation isn't going to pull that trigger faster.

If your flashy mannerisms express your sexuality, hetero or homo, they should be toned down. One needs to be aware of their actions and how they affect others. Sexual advances or connotations are not always desired and they can constitute harassment.

Are you in favour of a "don't ask, don't tell" policy? Do you have your own view of an appropriate policy? Do you think I'm completely out to lunch with my idea?


Armed and dangerous,



  1. Am I correct to assume you are talking about the US policy don't ask don't tell and their military? Because the Canadian military does not have this ridiculous and stupid policy.

  2. That would be correct, I am speaking about a policy of the American military.

  3. "Currently, in the Canadian military one is not permitted to have a relationship of any sexual substance while deployed. "


    So what does this mean if you're married and in the military and you get deployed? You're not supposed to? I'm confused.

  4. Oh let me clarify!

    The rule in the Canadian military is as follows:

    Canadian soldiers in Afghanistan and civilian
    employees, including journalists embedded
    alongside them, must follow very strict rules
    governing behaviour with each other. No intimate
    personal relationships are allowed in theatre,
    including those involving married couples
    deployed at the same time.

    “Sexual activity or any other form of intimate
    contact in any context with another individual is
    prohibited anywhere in the Joint Task Force
    Afghanistan Area of Operations,” according to
    theatre standing orders governing personal

    (Taken from The National Post, May 29, 2010)

    The above article describes one of our best, the commander of the Canadian Forces in Afghanistan no less, being sent home for nookie with a rookie.

    In such a charge it is always the higher ranking officer who takes the hit.

    Does that make sense?


  5. I blogged today about it. Totally forgot about your post until just now. How funny is that. Go read my post. You can ignore the battle of words in the comment section if you like it kind of became off topic between Tobei and Gucci Mama.

    Love it.. nookie with a rookie.

  6. Hehehehehe... I just wrote a BOOK on your post. I really enjoyed it!