Friday, October 22, 2010

Tossed: Tomato Soup

Tis the season for tomato soup.

As part of Veggie & Fruit Induction '10 I have rid my house of all chocolates and cakes. All of my pizzas and pastas and anything delicious is gone. Well, Newf usually brings home the good stuff but that is another story.

Point is, when I get hungry there isn't much to do but eat something healthy. Sometimes I wait awhile, hoping a pizza will magically appear. Sometimes I settle for a PB&J. Tonight, I cracked a can of tomato soup.

This tasty red stuff is something of childhood memories. Most would associate it with cold days of snow, tobogganing and grilled cheese.

Tomato soup does not remind me of grilled cheese, snow or sledding. Tomato soup reminds me of the fact that the plants in the Galleria Mall in London, Ontario are real. That's right, they have real plants baby.

Back when I was a youngster, perhaps 12 or 13 my mother decided to take my younger siblings and I shopping. She loaded us three into her car and off we went, 45 minutes to the Galleria, which in that day was quite the mall. Now, not so much.

As a country kid, mall trips were special things.

Anyways, we were happily bouncing around when I suddenly felt a gurgle in my stomach. The gurgle was not a good one, my stomach was not happy. Stuck in the middle of traffic (which was never my mother's forte) I knew what was about to happen and had to warn my mother. "Mom, I'm going to throw up!"

Panic took over. My mom was not going to get out of traffic. She could not pull over because some mother f#*k@r had taken two cars out and rendered traffic to a stand still.

My mother responded, very matter-of-factly, "Lindsay, just try to keep it on the floor mat!"

Well, my aim did not fail me that day. No, not at all. I hit the floor mat of her backseat with full force. Undigested tomato soup and crackers spewed from my mouth like a bad word. My siblings were crawling up the walls of the car and my mother managed to pull over.

The floor mat went directly into a garbage can.

Feeling much better, the four of us continued on our way to the mall, hoping the projectile puke was a one shot deal.

Hope was all we would have. I threw up three more times, all in the mall. Once in a garbage can and twice in real potted plants. I remember being impressed as I pushed my fingers into the cool dirt surrounding the plant. Here I thought I was simply defacing some plastic plant.

Real plants rule.

That day the mall had class and some (free) extra fertilization. I had a day I will never forget.

Tis the season for tomato soup. Enjoy!

Never quite normal,


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