It's a Sick Sunday: All About Me

Good evening folks,

So, hopefully you have been reading along, enjoying my content and sarcasm.  You are slowly learning about me and gathering info on some off-the-wall social skills.

You are likely wondering where I am going with this blog.

Well, I don't quite know yet.  I am hoping to pass on the wisdom of benefit of etiquette while encouraging you (and me) to be the best we can be.  Right now I am attempting to figure out a routine and suitable subjects all while including everything I want to say.

I need to be a little more candid.  This piece has been very difficult for me because as a business writer I avoid using the word "I" like the plague.  It always makes me feel like the sun - self-centred.

If I am lucky enough to have dutiful readers you may (or may not) be wondering who, exactly, I am.  Well, hold on to your bonnets because I aim to give you a little look into the world of Linnie.

I have composed a list of twenty things about me.  Seeing as I am in a silly mood, I have made an attempt at humour.  I assure you, everything written is actually correct, if a little weird.

Folks, weird is just how I roll - I am always a little off kilter.

Enjoy!

• I have lived through an explosion (and subsequent fire) that levelled the better part of a city block.
• I have lived through a major flood (and only got a little wet).
• When surrounded by multiple funnel clouds, I took a shower in the rain and called my colleagues cowards.
• I am actually terrified of tornadoes.  Little did I know that my mother had lied when she told me tornadoes need the sun to touch down.  It was the only way she could get me to sleep and I believed her until I was sixteen.
• The only time my father visited a strip club (that I know of), I told him which one to go to.
• My husband went to the strip club too.
• Shortly before the aforementioned explosion I was offered a stripping job.  I was unemployed and considering it until the strip club burned (I have a way with fire).
• I met the Newf and eight months later I married him.
• The Newf proposed while I was in handcuffs.  It was very quick and a matter of necessity.  We are just that romantic.
• I am scared of the dark.  I have lots of night lights and a big 'ol Maglite, just in case.
• I really, really like cars and insist on driving a stick shift.  It's hot (and so much fun).
• I am a dancing machine.
• I grew up in a town of approximately 1200 people.  I consider myself hillbilly chic.
• Lucan, my hometown, is the home of the Black Donnellys, one of Canada's largest unsolved murders.  Check them out here.
• As a result of my small town farming roots I know a lot about animals.  I love them dearly but define them strictly as animals (no doggie strollers or sweaters here).
• I have never been awarded less than second place in a wet t-shirt contest.
• My fine china is not hidden away in a cabinet.  I use my best everyday.
• Judith Martin, aka Miss Manners, is my hero.  She is simply devine.
• I have eight piercings (only six have jewellery) but do not consider myself overly Holy.

Now that you are suitably frightened (and hopefully intrigued) I will ask: What should I know about you?  Do you have a list?  An interesting tidbit?  Leave a note (or a URL) below so I can check YOU out!

Cleverly candid,

L